This Can't Be Happening
by Ember of Hell
Summary: Max found herself laying in bed with Sonic...did they really do it or is this some kind of prank? It is rated M...small children and horny bastards...do not click the title....
1. What just happened?

**This is Maxie speaking...ahem i belong to Darkfire1313 (who really needs to change her name...why not use her real name which is censored.Kai BHE ! On with the story!**

**This is DF Maxie needs to stop...anyway what she said.**

Max woke up one sunny afternoon. She rolled to her side to check the clock on her nightstand only to find no clock.

"Where is my clock?" she asked no one in paticular. She looked around the unfamiliar room. It had posters all over the blue painted walls. It had a guitar in the corner. The closet was wide opened but had no clothes but had shoes similiar to what Max wears. The window's blinds were open.(Max keeps them closed) And an old computer, Max's was new, rested on a rusty desk. She looked around some more.

"Oh shit!" Max jumped. A blue hedgehog layed in bed next to her sucking his thumb. She dreaded him ever since they met. He was sleeping like a baby. "So wrong"Max screeched loudly. Sonic opened his eyes and sat up holding his head.

"What happened...oh headache" he stared at Max blankly "What are you doing here?"

"I dont know!" she aswered in a high pitched voice neither of them reconized. Sonic turned around to the night table on his side as if looking for something, and a second later he picked up a small package. Max laughed histerically.

"It's a small!" she still laughed "You're a small!"

Sonic ignored this but asked "You dont think we..." Max shook her head.

"Of course not!" she squealed again "We would never...right?" Max got nervous.

"Check if you are naked." Sonic instructed her. Max peeked under the covers but quickly took them away from Sonic.

"Gimme the covers!" She took them away making Sonic fly off the bedlanding hard on his but. "So wrong!" she squealed again "So, so wrong!"

"I wonder what it was like," Sonic said acting like he was deep in thought. Max sneered "You disgust me" Sonic jumped back on the bed so he could take a peek. Max slapped his hand. "Pervert!" Sonic merely grinned and shrugged when Max told him to never talk about this to anyone.

"It still would have been nice..." Max slapped him in the face. There was a knock on Sonic's room door.

"Quick hide!" Panicking she went on top of Sonic under the covers._ When will this end? _But Sonic made it worse "Ooooo" he said "Me likey." She punched him in the small groin of his.

"Hey Sonic."

"Espio hi!"

"Listen my birthday is coming up...i'm having a party it is all guys exept for Kai and Max...but I went to Max's house and she wasn't there..."

"Really...interesting..."

"Well i hope she comes i really like her...she is..." Espio went on and on about how cool Max is. Max started stroking Sonic's------never mind. Sonic made a loud squeal.

"Oops." Max whispered to herself.

"You okay man?" Espio asked Sonic.

"Fine..." Sonic managed to chock.

"All right...see ya.." Espio waved goodbye and walked out. Sonic looked out the window to see if he was long gone. "You can come out now" Sonic whispered. Max quickly poked her head out to get some air. She was running out.

"What was that?" Sonic asked.

Max blushed "Sorry" she said in a small voice.

"Don't be...that was nice..." Sonic said which made her blush harder.

**If you got horny reading...never mind just review...Dont worry BHE your charector is in the next chappie.**

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	2. Perverted Humor

**Some sonofabitch keeps giving me bad reviews...if you hate my stories so damn much why read it? Anyway Kai is BHE's...**

Sonic leaned his face closer...So did Max but stopped when Sonic's eyes widened. Sonic stared just below Max's face.

"Woah..." he said. Max looked down to see her boobs out of the covers. She covered them quickly. (ewwwwwwwww...this is something BHE would write or type or whatever...)

For moments they layed there staring at each other. Finally Sonci cracked, trying to pull Max's hands off the covers he moaned and pleaded. "Just a peek? Come on!"

"No you little pervert!" she squealed.

"Just a glance?"

"NO!"

**Knuckles house...(yea!)**

Knuckles and Kai were sitting at the table of the kitchen in Knuckles house. Staring in each others eyes they moved there faces closer...

Espio came bursting in.

"Hey guys!" Espio yelled happily "Oh maybe I should have knocked." Kai got upset.

"Or maybe not come in at all!" she whined. Knuckles and Kai havent got a chance to kiss yet. They were always interrupted and too disturbed to go back to it. Kai slumped into her seat.

"Any ways..." Espio continued as if the comment never happened. "My birthday party is..."

"We know..." they said in unison. "And we are invited..."

"Is there anyone that you invited that has never been to your--" Kai started

"I finally got the guts to invite Max, but---"

"Really that's great!" Knuckles said

"You know she really likes you" Kai said

"Where is she?" Espio asked "If i dont get in touch with her she cant come..." He took a seat uninvited but Knuckles didnt mind. Espio seemed really bummed and neither of them wanted to make it worse.

**Sonic's house...**

"Fine i give up" Sonic said " There's no use in it.."

"Good" Max said. Sonic slowly went under the covers, but Max didnt notice until..

"Eeeek!" she squealed "Oh you pervert!" She got out of bed and got her clothes. Sonic whatched.

It took Max a little while to realize it but when she did she let out a cry of frustration.

"You did that just to get me out of bed!" She screamed

"Whatever are you talking about?" he smiled.

"Pervert!"

"You know the longer you stand there the more pleasure for me..." Max's right eye twitched, she grabbed her clothes and went in his bathroom.

"I will treasure this moment forever!" Sonic said as Max got out of the bathroom fully dressed. Max opened his room door and started to walk out.

"Max wait!" Sonic ran up to Max. They stared for a while Sonic's eyes green eyes burned into Max's pink ones. Sonic's face went closer and closer and finally pressed his lips against Max's. Sonic did not know that she was fighting herself inside.

_Stop it Sonic! You fag!_

_No Sonic make this last forever..._

_Get off of me! I hate you!_

_Sonic i never thought I'd say this but i'm in love with you..._

Sonic stopped a few seconds later...smiling at Max. By the look on his face about to say something stupid. Max opened the door and ran out.

**To tell you the truth I am scaring myself... anyways...good reviews only dont be the next son of a mothermonkey's furry ass...**


	3. Drunk?

**I found out who the person is who kept sending me bad reviews he emailed me...stalker...anyway we became friends so quick it is hard to explain i dont even want to...kai belongs to BHE and Freezie to the bastard who sent me bad reviews...just joking..his penname is Freezie...**

Kai and Knuckles walked down the busy street together. They were holding hands while swinging there arms, huge grins on there faces. They walked into a fast food place. Shadow was slurping his slushie when he saw them and immediately spit it back out. Kai and Knuckles walked up to the cashier.

"May I take your order?" she asked.

"Just a slushie please.." Knuckles said. The cashier turned around and walked to the slushie maker. When she gave Knuckles the slushie he grabbed to staws and went outside. Kai and Knuckles sat at one of the tables outside, and started sipping. Kai looked up to see Max walking towards her. As Max got closer both Kai and Knuckles saw tears in Max's eyes, by the look on Max's face she was frustrated. Max's hands was holding her forehead.

"Hey Max!" said Kai as she waved. Max went into the slushie shop.

"I wonder what's with her." Knuckles told Kai.

"I'll call her tonight to ask. A few minutes later Max came out with Shadow. Shadow seemed a little puzzled he kept asking Max questions, Knuckles and Kai could here him.

"Did you get drunk?" Shadow asked. Max shook her head.

"Did you want to at first?" Max looked up to glare at him.

"Just a question." Shadow said backing up a little.

"Well dont ask it again." Max walked a little ahead of Shadow, but still remained with him. They grew smaller and smaller until they dissapeared completely.

"Oh I am so calling her tonight." Kai said and turned around to go back to their slushie.

**Later tonight...**

"Max please tell us what happened." Kai pleaded. Max, Kai and Knuckles were at Espio's party.

"I dont think so." she said.

"Come on Max, please?" Knuckles went down on his knees. Max was about to laugh._ What a sight to see. _She thought smugly.

"Fine..." she said she pulled both Kai and Knuckles in the bathroom. She told them the story and paused with every comment and gasp.

"Maxie got drunk!" Kai said supprisly happily.

"No I didnt!" Max protested.

"So you did it on your own then?" Knuckles asked.

"No!" Max jumped back "Oh hell no!" She said as they walked out.

"Max I've been looking all over for you!" Max jumped for a second she thought it was Sonic but when she turned it was Espio instead.

"Paranoid..." Knuckles whispered in Max's ear.

"Shut up!" she shot back.

"Is this a bad time?"Espio asked "Coz I can leave..."

"No!" Max said "Come on!" she took Espio and went across the room.

**In the words of Tigger TTFN! Review okay...? **


	4. Sonic and Max?

**Alright you know the drill Authors note, story and then authors note, so here is the first one. Kai is BHE and Maxie's mine oh and Freezie to Freezie who will be in this chapter...**

"So what do you want?" she asked staring heavily into Espio's eyes. Espio's eyes widened at the look, Max had given him. Espio shook his head and decided to talk to her.

"I am glad you could come." he said a little flirty. Max didn't notice though she was concentrating on avoiding Sonic so much that she didn't even know that he was actually flirting! Espio got the feeling that Max didn't want to be seen with him, and hung his head down in shame. Max picked his head back up.

"What's wrong?" she asked.

"I understand if you don't want to be seen with me." he said, not staring directly at her.

"Huh? Oh no!" she said "I'm avoiding someone."

"Really?" Espio beemed he couldn't hide is happiness.

"Oh yeah."

"Who?" Max didn't answer instead she poked her head behind each side of Espio to see if the coast was clear. Sonic was coming near.

"Oh shit!" Max said "Bye!" she yelled as she took off she head into the direction of Kai and Knuckles who were talking to Freezie.

Espio spun around and came face to face with Sonic.

"Hey Espio," Sonic said "Have you seen Max?" Sonic said as he looked around to see if Max was anywhere in sight.

"Is something going on between you two?" Espio asked, he didn't want anything to happen between the two of them escpecially since she was about to ask her out.

"I sure hope so!" Sonic said and left Espio alone.

**So tell me people. Should I make Max go out with Sonic or Espio? You decide!**


	5. One little Problem

**Kai is BHE's, Freezie belongs Freezie and Maxie is mine.**

Kai and Knuckles turned around to greet Max. Freezie still had his back turned. Max smiled.

"Hi, Freezie," said Max. Freezie turned around. He seemed upset. His arms were crossed, and he glared at Max.

"You had sex with him?" Freezie asked angrilly.

"No!" Max said "I.dont.know!" Max turned to face the opposite way from Freezie hot tears streamed down her face. Freezie was about to put his hand on her shoulder to say he was sorry but then Sonic came. Freezie stopped and looked down his dreadlocks swayed with him.

"Hey Max." Sonic sayed.

"Shit!" she said softly, so only Freezie could hear. Freezie put his arms around Max's waist, Max put her hand on top of his and turned around to smile. Sonic saw this and felt a jolt of jelousy, but quickly removed it from his presence. Espio walked over to the little group.

"Woah Maxie!" Knuckles said "You're really pimping!"

"Shut up!" she snapped.

"A real pimpette!" Kai said

"I say again...shut up!" Max snapped. Suddenly, out of nowhere Shadow came, he then saw the little scene.

"Damn!" he said "Man Maxie!" Shadow saw how Sonic and Espio were looking at her and Freezie, and how Freezie's arm was around her waist and how his head rested around her shoulder.

_This is insane _Max thought. Max wanted to just turn around and kiss Freezie, but Espio was here and she really liked him too. Sonic was just playing himself, or that's what Maxie thought at first, but then she thought about that kiss. Warm, fuzzy, long not too wet not too dry. He had nice lips. Max got out of her dream-like state, when Freezie whispered into Max's ear.

"Tell Sonic to go away," he whispered "Tell Espio to come back later...it's my turn right now...his turn is next."

Max blushed so hard. Her eyes turned yellow, his voice seemed so sexy when he said this. Espio and Sonic saw this, and also heard what Freezie said. Espio was kind of happy in some way and upset in another. Sonic was just plain upset, so he blurted something that Max wished he didn't.

"Have you ever kissed Maxie before?" Sonic asked. _Oh fuck!_ Maxie thought. Freezie looked away from Max's neck and to Sonic.

"No but if you go away, and let us have our privacy maybe we can." Freezie said coldly.

"Oooo ice" Maxie said.

"I'd say he got burned," Shadow said

"Dissed!" Kai said

"Bit in the ass!" Knuckles said. Espio stood quiet, but smile. Max loved that smile of his. She loved something out of all of them, even some extra people. She loved Espio's smile. She loved Freezie's attitude. Sonic's kiss. Knuckles hotheadedness and Shadow's humor. She smiled at her thoughts. All those traits were the traits of a perfect guy. Well for Max that is. Max tried to think who she liked the most. Humor and Attitude are very important to Max and so is their lips, but it depends who the guy is who owns them, and since Freezie is the only guy she was okay with that had one of those things, she assumed she liked him better than Espio and Sonic.

Sonic and Espio left finally, but by that time the moment was ruined.

"And I really wanted that kiss!" Max complained. Freezie still had his arms around her, but he wasn't concentrating on Max anymore, instead he watched Espio and Sonic walk away. He glared at his backs.

**Freezie! Don't hate me! I know you have a girlfriend (and I hate you for it!) and I am really sorry! But this was a really long chapter hope I kept you guys interrested! Review. I LOVE REVIEWS!**


	6. The three perfect guys

**You can soooo tell I am bored because I wrote one chapter in Odd Couple, A one shot 2 chapters of this story and this will be the third. Okay Kai is BHE's and Freezie is Freezie's and Maxie is mine.**

Max saw Freezie stare. She grabbed his head and turned it to face hers. She lightly kissed him on the lips and smiled. Freezie smiled back.

Max walked to her house almost skipping the whole way there. She opened the front door to her house and screamed.

"Sonic! Why are you at my house!' she yelled angrilly. Sonic didn't answer but instead he walked closer to Max and kissed her on the lips the same moment happened as when they were in Sonic's room, but this time Max put her arm around his shoulders and pulled him closer to her face. Sonic took his face away from hers. Max looked at Sonic with her bright yellow eyes. She was in love. Max pulled his face closer to hers again, she couldn't help it. She wanted more.

"Ha ha ha!" laughed a dark voice "They are falling in love with each other!"

"A double wammy! We are making them fall in love and also making Freezie and Espio jelous!" said a soft delicate voice.

"What a plan!" said a strong sadducing voice.

Freezie walked to his house, he liked Max and her kiss, he wished it would be longer, though, it was only a peck.

"I bet Sonic's was longer," he said to himself glumly. "No fair, but then again Espio didn't get a kiss at all."

He went into his room, kicked off his shoes and jumped on the bed, he turned off his lights and drifted to sleep.

Knuckles and Kai wished that this story had more of them and less of the others, and sighed heavily. Knuckles kissed the sleeping Kai on the cheek, and went to sleep next to her.

Max hugged Sonic tightly not letting go. She didn't want to get rid of him. She wasn't going to let him leave her. So she squeezed him, Sonic pryed her fingers off of him slowly and went out the door. Before he closed the door fully, he blew her a kiss.

"Three perfect guys." Max said "Wait three!"

The next morning Max's phone rang.

"Hello Max, this is Shadow we are going to steal jewels today so get dressed."

"Kay." she did exactly what he told her and then went outside, to their secret hideout to meet them there.

Rouge was there already.Waiting for Max and Shadow she saw Max and greeted her.

"Long time huh?" Rouge said "So what's going on in your world?"

**Alright who do you think the three mysterious people are? Review please.**


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